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Friday, February 6, 2015

MLSE apologizes to Randy Carlyle

Leafs to nominate him for Jack Adams Award

The front office of Maple Leafs Sports and Entertainment today issued an apology to fired former Toronto Maple Leafs coach Randy Carlyle, and tomorrow plan to nominate him for the NHL's Jack Adams Award, which goes to the Coach of the Year. The MLSE statement, signed by Brendan Shanahan, read:

February 5, 2015
To: Randy Carlyle
From: Brendan Shanahan, MLSE

MLSE and the Toronto Maple Leafs extend a sincere apology for firing you in the middle of the 2014-2015 season. There were extenuating circumstances, and due to several mini-collapses, our GM Dave Nonis felt at the time that if he did not act decisively it could be his job that was on the line. The games since that fateful day have proven once again what an excellent coach and motivator you are, and that having the Leafs lead the NHL in goals and be in a playoff position were both significant accomplishments. In light of this, tomorrow we will submit your name for consideration for this season's Jack Adams Award. 

To be fair, we knew that this total collapse was a possibility, and if it had happened under your watch, you would not be nearly as employable as you are right now, smelling like roses and anticipating the offers that will surely come. Now that we have witnessed how this squad performs without your guidance and helmsmanship, it becomes more important than ever that we get a high draft pick this year. Anybody who watches future NHLers in junior and college hockey knows that there is a generational player and several franchise players available in the 2015 NHL Draft. Our focus for the remainder of this year will be on giving our younger players more and more ice time, to see who should be kept for the future and who will be packaged with a veteran or two at the trade deadline. You wouldn't have enjoyed being around for this sort of tailspin.

We want to thank you for your years of service to the Toronto Maple Leafs, and wish you luck in your future coaching positions.

Your friend,


by Joseph Trainor (Satire)

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